25.04.30 [영어/작문] Buddha's Birthday 작문
교정본
If citizens attend cultural events in society, they may understand other groups' cultures more deeply because a cultural event represents the group that holds it. Hence, attending different cultural events develops a considerate attitude towards members of the whole community.
You can remember the original cultural source by celebrating traditions regularly. In every moment of enjoying traditional activities, the cultural elements are passed across all generations. You can keep your culture alive this way.
I don't believe in any religion, frankly, as I consider that believing in myself is enough to live in reality. However, my family has faith in Buddhism, with which my parents secured a space in a temple to remember my deceased grandmother. My family visits the temple when we have a chance to do so, expecting that we will meet my grandmother.
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오늘의 노트
1. HIGHLIGHT:
Noun Form (tradition vs. traditions): The original sentence uses "tradition," which is singular. However, the sentence refers to multiple cultural customs or practices. In American English, when talking about various customs, the plural form "traditions" should be used to match the idea of celebrating more than one.
Word Choice (factor vs. elements): The original sentence uses "factor," which means a contributing part of a situation. While not completely wrong, "elements" is more accurate in this cultural context. "Elements" refers to individual parts or features that make up a whole—in this case, aspects of culture. It better fits the idea of cultural pieces being shared or transmitted.
Verb Tense/Form (is delivered vs. are passed): The original sentence uses "is delivered," which is passive voice and singular. However, "elements" is plural, so the verb must also be plural. "Are passed" is the correct plural verb form and also more natural in American English when describing how culture moves from one generation to another. "Passed" clearly describes transmission over time, which fits the meaning better than "delivered."
Article Use (all the generations vs. all generations): The original sentence says "all the generations," which is grammatically acceptable, but in American English, "all generations" is more concise and commonly used when speaking generally. Removing "the" makes the sentence smoother without changing the meaning.
2. EXAMPLES:
- Celebrating traditions is important for cultural identity.
- Many traditions are passed down from grandparents to grandchildren.
- The cultural elements of our history shape who we are today.
- Festivals are occasions where cultural elements are shared and enjoyed by everyone.
- All generations should learn about the traditions that came before them.
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격식 있게
Attending cultural events within a community can enhance understanding of the diverse cultures present. Each cultural event serves as a platform for the respective group to showcase its traditions and values. By participating in these events, individuals can develop a compassionate attitude towards fellow community members, fostering inclusivity and harmony.
Regularly celebrating traditions allows individuals to maintain a connection to their cultural heritage. Through the enjoyment of traditional activities, cultural elements are transmitted across generations. This practice is essential for preserving and nourishing the vitality of one's culture.
I do not adhere to any religion, as I believe that self-belief is sufficient for navigating reality. However, my family practices Buddhism. In honor of my deceased grandmother, my parents have secured a space at a temple. My family visits the temple whenever possible, with the hope of feeling a connection to my grandmother's spirit.
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자연스럽게
When people check out cultural events, they really get to know and understand other groups better because those events show what that group is all about. So, going to different cultural events helps everyone in the community be more understanding and friendly toward each other.
By celebrating traditions often, you can really remember where your culture comes from. Every time you enjoy traditional activities, you pass on those cultural elements to the next generations. That’s how you keep your culture alive!
Honestly, I don’t believe in any religion because I feel like believing in myself is enough to handle life. But my family practices Buddhism. They even got a spot in a temple to remember my grandma who has passed away. Whenever we can, we visit the temple to feel close to her.