25.01.29 [영어/작문] Digital restoration of Stele 작문

교정본

The development of new transportation means is inevitable, as the traffic on the roads in daily life, especially during rush hour, is serious nowadays in Korea. Most of the Korean population is inclined to be concentrated in the center of the capital. This is why a new transportation means, the flying car, can alleviate the issue of traffic jams by bringing air traffic to connect suburbs and cities that have not been used yet.  

As I imagine that the supply would be scarce when a flying car is just commercialized, I’m worried about the costly price of air traffic. At the very first stage of adopting air traffic, the users would be afflicted by non-affordable traffic fees to utilize the means as a regular part of life.  

When I think of the crowds commuting on the subway, I would be glad to take the flying car as a regular part of my daily commute. However, I’m still scared about whether the safety check procedure is perpetually secured, since I watched the live news conveying the case of an airplane crash at Muan International Airport killing hundreds of passengers a few weeks ago.

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오늘의 노트

Note:
That -  limits the meaning of the word it modifies and is important to get the meaning of the sentence. Since it contains important information, it is not set off with commas:

I like the bag that my father gave me.
The office that has two conference rooms is closed today.

Which - When the clause contains unimportant or additional information, it can be set off with commas. If you remove a clause with which from a sentence, the meaning does not change significantly.

(CORRECT) There was an earthquake in Japan, which is bad news.
Let us try removing the “which” clause:
(STILL CORRECT) There was an earthquake in Japan.

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격식 있게

The development of new modes of transportation is necessary, as traffic congestion on the roads, particularly during rush hour, has become a significant issue in Korea. A large portion of the Korean population tends to be concentrated in the center of the capital city. Therefore, the introduction of a new transportation method, the flying car, has the potential to alleviate traffic jams by facilitating air travel between suburbs and cities that have not yet been connected.

However, I anticipate that there may be a limited supply of flying cars when they are first commercialized, leading to concerns about the high costs associated with air travel. During the initial stages of this new mode of transportation, users may be burdened by unaffordable fares, making it difficult to incorporate it as a regular aspect of daily life.

While I would be pleased to use a flying car as part of my daily commute, especially when compared to the crowded conditions of the subway, I also have concerns regarding the reliability of safety checks. This apprehension has been heightened by recent news reports detailing an airplane crash at Muan International Airport that resulted in the loss of hundreds of lives just a few weeks ago.

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자연스럽게

You know how crazy traffic gets around here, especially during rush hour in Korea, right? It’s a big problem because so many people live in the capital city. That's why I think flying cars could really help. They would let people travel by air, which might fix some of those annoying traffic jams connecting the suburbs to the city.

But honestly, I’m a bit worried about how expensive flying cars might be at first. I mean, when they first come out, it’s likely that not many will be available, and people might have to pay a lot just to use them regularly.

Sometimes, when I see all the people packed into the subway, I think it’d be amazing to fly to work instead! But I can’t help but feel a little scared about how safe they are. I remember seeing news about a bad airplane crash at Muan International Airport that hurt a lot of people, and it makes me think twice.